Does Keeping A Diary Help? Options

[RainbowLove]

Hi all,

I'm just wondering if it's good for keeping a diary? I've read quite some articles about treating depression and it seems like some say yes and some don't mention about it.

I know I have severe depression for many years and I want to help myself recover. I have no money to go for therapy and medicine so all I can depend on is self help .

Does anyone has the experience of keeping a diary for the purpose of treating depression? If so, would you mind advise me on what I should write? Last time, my free social worker told me to write on 3 things that make me feel happy daily (eg: the dinner is great etc), I stopped after awhile coz the sadness was too overwhelming. I feel no happiness.

Thanks in advance if anyone is willing to share

[bonniegeen]

Rainbowlove....Welcome to the forum. You'll find a lot of help here and resources. We've all been there before in one way or another and are in various stages of recovery or relapse. You'll always find support here, and a laugh once in a while!!

In reading your post you say that you have no money for medications. Quite a few medications are now available in generic form...and the big drug companies do offer some assistance to people with no insurance and no money. They are great. Just look up the drug and the website should direct you to a helping organization. One other that deals with all the companies at once is PPRX....search for that, you should find something.
That, to me, was very instrumental on my road to stability. It was only then that I could get my thoughts straight and relieve the extreme despair and sadness enough to write. I found journaling does help a lot. I mainly wrote my feelings and tried to explore why I was feeling that way. And try to look beyond blaming a situation or person in your life....try to figure out maybe why you are reacting that way to that person or situation. Is there something in your past (childhood, teen years, early adult life) that has programmed that reaction. For instance..... I grew up old school where if you were knocked down you pulled yourself up by your bootstraps and met the fight head on. When the depression first hit, I was looking to fix it, or supress it because in my family you were never a victim or suffered from anything. I was raised to always be strong and never whine or cry about stuff, just fix it and move on. Well, that thought process kept me fighting myself for so long. Through journaling and reviewing the journal I realized that there are some things that are out of my control and I need to ask for help...that's tough, but necessary.
Also with journaling your thoughts, try journaling your dreams as well. Our subconcious can give us clues to the root cause behind our thoughts and feelings. Find a dream book at your local library and look up the key people, features and events in your dreams. After two weeks you may see a pattern that can lead you to understand a direction for change.
I hope all this helps a little. Get on medication and/or in therapy. Some churches offer therapy with a pastor or priest at little or no charge. Sometimes just having an uninvolved outsider to dump all the ugly and dark feelings on helps lighten the load.
Take care and keep coming back. I wouldn't be on my road to wellness without the great people at this forum!!!

[RainbowLove]

thanks bonniegeen for your kind advice.

Oh I didn't know there are companies that offer free drugs? Definitely gonna give it a try.

Yeah I write alot but in a different way than what you've mentioned. Normally I would write about something but without digging deep to the crux of the problems. Mmm...maybe I should go that way.

Thanks...really appreciate it. you might have just save me from drowning.

[fired44]

'journaling' is a 'staple' item of recovery---and safe---while there may be many 'free' drug co. offerings, you must exercise caution, and consider them as often little more than 'legal-dope-pushers'---the old American term, 'pill-pushers' still has an element of tragic truth---such that it has become an international scandal. if there is any way you may survive, w/o these offers, please try---you have 'natural' alternates---from st. john's wort, 5-htp, lots of coffee, siberien gensing, mega b-vitamin supplements (very important, as lack of same often manifest as even schizophrenia)---
i've found 5-htp very useful---many on-line sources exist, as local pharmacies---prices/quality do vary---but after 20 years as a drug co. 'lab-rat', i and many have learned---be careful, and look at your b-vitamin intake---it should be higher than any 'minimums' commonly stated---and 'journaling' is not only therapeutic, it's the best way to track what works, vs. not---
few understand how truly unique each person is---we look similar, but our chemistries are usually very different---once you embark on the 'mental-health' system? your choice, but most find it difficult to return as themselves---if you are a potential 'social-disaster'---mass-killer, etc.---well, get competent help---otherwise exhaust any nutritional/natural remedies---and write your buns off---it works. it's safe.

[bonniegeen]

Hello again Rainbowlove and Fire....

You're right fire..I too have read that deficiencies in B vitamins, as well as potassium can contribute to feelings of depression and lethargy. Those were good suggestions. I have tried them, but didn't seem to be effective for me.

Glad to be of help Rainbow. Sometimes just knowing there are others that have been where you are, or are where you are can make all the difference.
Keep coming back!!
Bonnie

[RainbowLove]

thanks for the replies guys,

yeah you are right fire, if i can cope without the drugs, that's the best. i've been taking my vitamins for quite some times but not quite helpful. anyway, thanks for telling me about journaling.

btw, do you guys read back the journal you wrote?

i've just found another new interest. the other day i was so so so depressed and really felt like dying inside. there was so much anger and pressure in me that i dunno know why they were there. i went to yoga and exercise, and suddenly i saw a sandbag and i started punching at it. damn it's fun. i put all my strength and energy to it and it's like i was punching at my depression and releasing all the anger i have inside. it was exhauting but it felt great.

[bonniegeen]

Yes, I do read back my journal when the mood strikes me. It sometimes helps if I feel like I'm backsliding, to see where I've been and work myself out of it.

I like the sandbag thing!!! Thats cool!! I know they say exercise helps a lot, and I say the more aggressive the better!!!

[RainbowLove]

ic...thanks

the sandbag...lol...fun. punching at the sandbag helps me drain out my pain, sadness...all the negativity...and i actually visualize people that did me wrong in the past...and i was like "there you go, take this you crap!"...and i put on some loud noisy music to heat up the fire in me.

"the more aggressive the better" - agreed

[replystreet]

Keeping a diary is also a good thing. Especially for depression. That way you can go back and reflect. You can see where you came from and where you're at now. The progress you made the mistakes you made. Reflect and know what you can do to do better and what you did right. Good way to keep a record of progress.