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Boyfriend broke up during a slow dance

     

Posted by Alexis : Jan 8, 2011

I was 13 and my boyfriend broke up with me during a slow dance. I know what you are thinking, I wasn't in love with him or whatever, I heard that a lot. At the time though, it really felt like I did love him. For nine months after that, I was depressed. I didn't do homework, I couldn't sleep right, I was always tired, and never felt like doing anything. I cut myself too, and couldn't stop. My parents also recently got divorced, we moved to another state, my mom was with a woman, and she drank a lot. I hated feeling trapped, and I tried everything to get out of it. I failed three classes that year. I didn't tell anyone really what was wrong. Thankfully, though, I had my friends who cheered me up. In march of that year, that guy asked me out again, and I said yes. That whole time, I was always worried he would do it again. He wasn't very nice to begin with. He hit me once and tried feeling me up. I finally was convinced to go talk to the guidance counselor, which made me feel much better. I was told that he was emotionally abusive. After a month, I was sick of being paranoid, so I broke up with him.

During this time, I actually thought about suicide. I never thought that I would actually go through with doing it, but I did think about it. I told a good friend of mine this, and he told me that many people really care about me, including him. A week or so later, that friend, who is a really great guy, asked me out. I'm still with him now, nearly two years later. We have a really great relationship, and he is my best friend. We don't fight, he treats me really well, and he genuinely cares about me and my whole family really. I love him, and I know he loves me. But for a while, I couldn't get over the other guy. I stopped cutting myself, it was really difficult to do so, but worth it. I started drinking though, which isn't much better. I made bad decisions and cheated on my boyfriend. I felt depressed again because I was so angry and disappointed in myself.

After that, I realized that I needed to make changes to my life, and I stopped drinking. I told my boyfriend what I did, and thankfully, he forgave me. Now, I'm much better. I do really well in school now; I'm in the top of my class. I'm a lot happier now, and I learned a lot from that year, and I'm much stronger. So, if you are reading this and you feel trapped, and like there is no way out, I promise you, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You just need to hold on, and be strong. Everything will work out.

Posted by Alexis : Jan 8, 2011

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